I'm THAT Guy

While walking the dog the other night, I had a revelation. Ya see, living out in the country, with no street lights and no neighbors, when I walk the dog I don’t worry too much about “dressing up”. So, I was standing there in the middle of the field, in my house shoes, boxer shorts and holey t-shirt, drinking a beer while my dog was smelling along the fence row where the coyotes seem to play.

Now, I was staring up at the stars, pondering the universe, when it hit me. I’m that guy. You know, that guy you see on TV, standing there in his house shoes, boxer shorts, holey t-shirt and drinking a beer, explaining that while he was outside walking his dog, aliens swooped down and picked him up! And, because he’s standing there as he is, in his house shoes, boxer shorts, holey t-shirt, and probably still drinking a beer, you just don’t give his story much credibility.

Now, no one cares that I’ve climbed the corporate ladder. Okay, so I didn’t climb it all the way to the top, but Dad always taught me not to stand on the top rung of a ladder, else you fall off. And no one cares that every 6 to 8 years I quit my job, travel the country and “find myself”, knowing that if and when I’m ready to work I can always find a new state and insert myself back into that corporate world. And no one cares that I have a successful E-commerce business with the added benefit of being able to help people become financially free. Heck, no one even cares that I have TWO motorcycles, neither of which is a Harley, which means they both run and no one is interested in stealing them.

Nope, all anyone would care about is the fact that I was standing in the middle of the field, in the middle of the night, in my house shoes, boxer shorts, holey t-shirt and drinking a beer. And they wouldn’t believe that aliens swooped down and picked me up. And, once the aliens were done learning everything I know about the world, which really wouldn’t take too long unless they asked me about energy drinks or how to quit your job, they’d swoop down and drop me off, knowing that no one would believe me.

So, I decided right then and there that when I’m out walking the dog in the middle of the night, I need to have a much better image, so that way when the aliens swoop down and pick me up, people WILL believe me.

So from now on, when I walk the dog, I make sure I wear one of my best t-shirts. Preferably one without swears words on it.

Life is good, see ya in the National Enquirer.